Butch's condition deteriorated rapidly in the hours following yesterday's post. By late afternoon he could no longer get up without assistance. When we helped him up, his back legs didn't work properly and sometimes his feet landed on the tops of his paws instead of on the pads. He fell a few times. Last night he could not get comfortable and slept no more than an hour and a half all night long. His breathing was distressed, but he didn't cry, and I am hoping that means he wasn't in a lot of pain.
By dawn today he was disoriented. I've posted before about not wanting to put him through the trauma of a car ride on what might be his last trip to the vet, but this morning we needed to get him there fast. As I sat beside him in the backseat of the car, he did not seem to be stressed, and I can say in all honesty that I don't think he even realized where he was.
For months I have dreaded having to make the decision to end Butch's life. This morning that decision was an easy one. This time, I knew, Butch's brave spirit wasn't going to pull him through.
I know that some of you have grown to love Butch after getting to know him on these pages, so I will offer condolences to you and know that you understand the magnitude of my own loss. Wherever Butch's spirit is as I write these words, I hope he can run fast and see for miles and miles and miles.
Butchifer Patrick
March 19, 1998 - February 9, 2012
Oh Velvet! I'm crying over your loss, but am so glad that Butch is pain-free. It's amazing how they just let us know when it's time.
ReplyDeleteSending rottie kisses to you.
-Lisa, Bart and Ruby
Linda,
ReplyDeleteI am so very sorry for your loss. Butch was such a wonderful companion. I thoroughly enjoyed the times I was able to visit him and place my hands on his wondeful thick coat. As you know, his picture is framed and in my office. His is a place among some wonderful people and animals I've been blessed to know. Butch was such a special guy. I hope that your memories provide comfort to you during this sad time. How lucky he was to have you guide and care for his life.
Sending love and hugs,
Alison
Lisa, thank you. I know this same kind of pain is still fresh in your heart.
ReplyDeleteAlison, thank you so much. I'm glad you got to meet him, and I love that you have his picture on your special wall.
I am so sorry.
ReplyDeleteOh Linda! I'm so sorry! I know I never met your Butch but he just had such a HUGE place in my heart! His spirit made my heart soar! His gorgeous gams made me wish I could roll on the floor with him. He was one special boy.
ReplyDeleteI've lost two pet friends this week. I can't take any more!
Hugs to you and your family!
I'm sorry Linda. I know he had a wonderful life because of you and the love you gave him. You will have memories of him forever - what a blessing he must have been to you as well. :( My heart dropped when I saw this post. You are in my thoughts.
ReplyDeleteLaura
I hope he's with Kadi, running all over the place and seeing things he never got to see. And I hope he gets a treat whenever he wants!
ReplyDeleteI'll be visiting the Baby Butch photos, even though my heart aches.
Hugs to you.
Linda, I have no words except to say how sorry I am. Everyone loved Butch and I know how much you loved him. I know how you feel but he knew how much you love him and he did probably know where he was going with much relief on his part. That's what love is.
ReplyDeleteI'm so sorry. I loved reading about Butch and I will miss him. Big hugs for you and for Levi.
ReplyDelete-Ellen
I am so sorry for your loss! Our four legged friends stay in our hearts forever. A little piece of our heart goes with them.
ReplyDeleteSending you big hugs!
xo Catherine
I am so sorry for your loss, Linda. But he and Kadi are together once more. Bless you for making his life as wonderful as it was.
ReplyDeleteI am so very sorry for your loss. Its always a bit perplexing how a creature so physically different from ourselves can become so entwined in our hearts and lives. From your posts, I came to know and love Butch and I will greatly miss the updates on his endeavors. Thank you, Linda for sharing his life with us all.
ReplyDeleteLinda. I'm so, so sorry. It was not long ago we lost our Nate and I know how difficult it is. Nate, too, let us know it was his time.
ReplyDeleteButch was such a great character with a huge heart. These animals who come to us to give us guidance and protection are so remarkable. Butch is pain free now and re-discovering his sea legs.
What a sweet, sweet dog he was...I really wish I had been able to meet him in the flesh.
Take care of yourself and your remaining furry family members. Love and hugs to you..
Just wanted to let you know you are in my thoughts today! So so sorry...
ReplyDeleteLucy, thanks.
ReplyDeleteHolly, I know you know how much he means to me. Thank you.
Laura, thanks. Yes, he was a blessing. I've always believed that loving feels even better than being loved, and it was always so easy to love Butch.
Janet, I know you've recently experienced exactly what I'm feeling. I hope he's with Kadi, too. She would no doubt make sure he behaves appropriately in Heaven.
Nan16, you're another one who has been through this too recently. Thanks for your kind words.
Ellen, hugs are powerfully healing, so thank you very much. I've passed one on to Levi.
Catherine, thanks. You are exactly right.
Val, the thought that he might be with Kadi is really comforting. Thank you.
Anonymous, I wish you weren't anonymous so I could thank you specifically for your kind words and thoughts. They mean a lot to me.
Marion, I remember when you lost Nate, and I remember thinking at the time that Butch wouldn't be far behind him, nor I far behind you in experiencing the loss and sadness. Thanks for being with me through your kind words.
Holly, thanks again. I did manage to get some much-needed rest last night, so my emotions are a little less raw today.
Aww Linda, I was so sorry to read about Butch, I felt like I knew him. There are no words that will make this easier for you...just time, and hopefully then the memories will bring more smiles than tears. I have loved all of my dogs, but in my heart there is that one that held a special place. She's been gone 3 years now, and I still miss her. I will be thinking about you and Butch. I know he's running free with beautiful eyes that can see now. You are the best dog caretaker I have ever known.
ReplyDeleteKybeadmaker, thank you for your kind words. It's been almost 11 months since Kadi passed, and I've just about reached a point where happy memories of her outnumber sad thoughts of her loss. I'm sure it will be that way with Butch, too, though it's always hard to remember that when the loss is so fresh and the emotions so raw. As for being a good caretaker, I appreciate the supportiveness of that statement, but I really don't think I'm anything special. I care for them the way I do because I have no choice. When a dog loves you, trusts you, and depends on you, it makes you want to do everything in your power to be the kind of human that dog thinks you are. All I ever do is try to live up to that.
ReplyDelete