Will you be my valenTIME?

During afternoon drive time yesterday, I heard the radio deejay request listeners to phone in their favorite Valentine's Day stories. One southern gentleman called in with a tale of such long-term devotion that I tried to remember it to share with you. This may not be exact, but it's pretty darn close:

Caller: Me and this ol' gal went out a couple of times 31 years ago, and she wanted a Jesus-head ring, and...

Deejay: She wanted a what? A Jesus head-ring?

Caller: Naw, a Jesus-head ring, y'know, like they had back then, so I went out and looked all over th' place and finally found a special one, one that had diamonds in th' eyes. I give her that ring for Valentime's Day and she was some excited to get it.

Unfortunately, I had to concentrate on merging onto I-10 about that time and missed a bit of the story, but I did comprehend that the romance hadn't blossomed in spite of his generosity. The story continued:

Caller: So anyway, she called me up th' other day and tol' me that she had wore that ring ev'ry single day, for 31 years, until she lost it last year at th' Mardi Gras. So I got to thinkin', and I went out lookin' and tryin' to find one, and I couldn't find one anywhar, so I finally described to this here feller what I wanted, and he made me up a Jesus-head ring -- with diamonds in th' eyes, now -- and I'm gonna give it to her this year for Valentime's Day. And she don't know nothin' about it.

Deejay: Now, was this your wife...or your girlfriend, or...

Caller: Naw, we just went out a couple of times, but we never...waal, I guess I always did have a kind o' love for that ol' gal.

Happy Valentine's Day to all the people I love. You know who you are.